Psychology de Teodoro
Had a no-show on Thursday, so I had some time to kill. Took a psychology assessment of myself, since I have access to that stuff. I took the single most validated and researched psychological assessment instrument that exists. 567 true/false questions. It's the real deal. A very good assessment. Very complicated, and hard to fake...even if you know what the test does. Very good test/re-test reliability, since it's hard to remember 567 questions. So it didn't matter that I knew the test. I might have been able to fake some stuff, but the test is sophisticated enough that even if I tried to fake some stuff, it would nail me on others. I say this to say: I took a test.
I am:
1) psychologically well-adjusted
2) faking good
3) frankly psychotic and delusional
This is true. Those are quotes. I spiked on the "paranoia" scale, which means I make shit up. I am able to fake my way through my day so that people don't notice that I make shit up. Besides that, I'm really a pretty healthy guy. That's what that says.
I think there was also something there about being overly sensitive and brooding. No shit, right?
But isn't that how we want our psychologists-in-training to be? Overly sensitive and brooding, and with a goatee full of steadily whitening hair? Furrowed brow? Knuckles to chin?
And am I now breaking my Bonaduce-inspired stance about keeping the therapy door closed?
Oh stop. I'm just having fun and I can't sleep. (See: delusional worry in the previous sentence.)
posted by Teodoro Callate @ 12:09 AM
10 comments
10 Comments:
can you get me a copy of that bad boy?
What does faking good mean?
Smuss - Sorry, no can do. It's all on computer, so it's not portable.
Bets - The part about me faking my way through a day. The test says that I make myself appear more healthy than I actually feel. Interestingly, #1 and #2 are not mutually exclusive...they actually can go together.
Don't worry, people, I'm fine. (See! I did it again!)
That is interesting about 1 and 2, because in light of your explanation, I am quite sure I am also both. But I'm not sure either of us are psychotic and delusional - well, in any sort of debilitating way. Ha. Our psychotic delusions are manageable.
Bets - Exactly!
it sounds like you need a good night's rest, Teo.
Boy, you said it...
dude, this weekend i saw several eps of breaking bonaduce. (i always manage to see several eps of a reality show i think 'i am NEVER watching THAT -- e.g., my fair brady, being bobby brown, breaking bonaduce.)
holy shit. i feel so bad for the guy. massive bipolar not on his meds (i think i finally heard the word in a trailer -- but it takes one to know one.), relapsing drunk, paranoid, out of control.
he doesn't stand a chance if he doesn't sober up. and his wife is in the shit, too...although the therapy IS helping her sort of start to break out of the codependence.
wow. so sad to watch this go down on tv. i notice they're running a shitload of commercials for what seems to be a government sponsored hotline for recovery/mental health referral hotline. i want to call and ask them: is the first thing you suggest AA?
i'm just so blown away by this whole show. here i said i wasn't going to watch cause it seemed so lame on the commercials, but now that i've seen it, i just realize if people have ANY clue what is going on here. from personal experience, i just know that this is just someone who is SUFFERING...
but still acting like a complete lunatic and creating a ton of wreckage.
one particular moment that just really struck me was when he goes and gets vodka and cranberry at a liquor store and totally chugs it down right on the curb and i'm thinking. wow, he's relapsing. and then i'm like...wow, someone's sitting there, filming him relapsing cause it makes really good tv. they're not trying to get him to call anyone. they're not asking him to call a sponsor (if he has one). they're just sitting there, rolling tape. whoa. how messed up is this? and the intensity and desperation with which he drinks the nearly whole thing in one long, hungry swallow.
wow.
Yeah, the Bonaduce thing is hard to watch. The more I see it though, I really don't think VH1 is on the hook for exploiting this. The backstory is that they really tried to shut it down and the Bonaduces wouldn't let them. And I'm pretty convinced that nobody's faking their behavior because the cameras are on. Nope. They're way over the top in real bad shape to be faking it.
I still don't like that the therapy is recorded. I have no reason to doubt the man's credentials, but there is no way to get a true feel for what is happening due to the editing process.
I saw the show last night and we are now in the episodes where things get worse before they get better.
As for people watching while he's relapsing? Yeah, tough to watch. Though clearly, there is no one there who could control him. That relapse is totally on him...not the camera guys or his friends or the producers or his wife. They did everything they could do and that guy is just so far off the beam. I'm glad we all know the ending of this series (as they did the pub for the series, we knew the ending before it began) and that we know he lives through this and is back to stable. For now, at least.
I agree, Smuss, watching him down those cocktails was painful. The whole thing is painful. It's delicate television to be sure, and I'm surprising myself by saying I don't think it's exploitative or wrong. ('cept the televised therapy) (then again, if they didn't show the therapy, and all we saw was the guy being a maniac, then i might not buy the show as valid...the truth is i believe the show is valid, and maybe that's because of the televised therapy) (so for therapy's sake, i wish it weren't televised. but for the story and show's sake, which counts because it's real, then maybe it's OK) (i dunno i dunno i dunno)
see to me, the therapy (?? WHAT therapy?) is hardly any more exploitative than any of it. i mean, the "therapy" that i've seen isn't really very substantiative (did i spell that right?). i feel like there must be parts that they're NOT showing on tv.
cause the parts i see, danny is freaky psycho danny, gretchen is obvs getting something out of the therapy we're NOT seeing on tv, and then the therapist just listens (ala most therapists).
i mean, the night when danny sits there, berating gretchen to TELL the therapist to say that she loves him? and then turns to her and gives her this dramatic speech (grabbing her face) and telling her that she's all he's ever loved and how he'll always love her, etc etc. (i'm NOT doing it justice -- it's been over a week) ???
i do NOT think danny was faking it (i think that's what headspace he was in), but i think THAT's when the therapist should have SAID SOMETHING! like ... umm. you can't force someone to love you, danny. or this behavior is ... or some shit. something better than the stuff i'd come up with on the fly right now PLUS stuff from hopefully being trained. i know everyone has a different style/approach, but i like a therapist to actually SAY stuff, point out things in my attitude/language/behavior. sometimes, when i'm too wacked out (in his case, perhaps), i don't HAVE the wherewithal/insight to hear myself feed it back to myself.
although, maybe the point comes when he freaks and says: what are you doing to my wife!?? maybe danny won't learn anything about his own behavior besides what happens when others leave him.
who knows. i'm not coherent right now. we should talk about this some time. it's fascinating to me.
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